The World, and Everyone in it, are Shit.

So these are the two bullshit things that have made me lose faith in the world. Corporate law, here I come.

1) So I get into the office today and find out that a motion we submitted (that I wrote!) was denied by an administrative body. The result: the highest ranking FBI agent who is fluent in Arabic and has extensive counterterrorism experience (including the first WTC Bombing, the Blind Sheik, and Osama) IS STILL NOT WORKING IN OPERATIONAL COUNTERTERRORISM. He's doing document identification. FUCK.

2) My coworker comes in and it turns out her purse was snatched on the train. So we call her cell phone and a guy answers, and tells us that he found the purse on the train and was leaving it at a Metro Station. So nice! Except the cock smoking bitch was lying. He didn't leave the purse. When we got to the station, they didn't know what we were talking about. He simply took everything in it and never answered the phone again. And when my friend stopped to tell a cop, this was the basic exchange:

Cop: So tell me what happened.

Friend: I went from the train to the bus, and somewhere along the way my purse went missing. We called the phone, a guy said the purse was here at the station, but it's not.

Cop: Oh. Well you're not getting that back.

Thanks, Officer Friendly.

The world is bad. And so is everyone in it. Except for my dog:

Sometimes, he eats cat poop.

I hear what I want to hear.

So I haven't posted in a while, mostly because my brain is rotting, as evidenced by an encounter I had with an intern at work today:

Me to Chris: Hey Chris, you heading home?

Chris to me: No, I'm going with Aaron to pick up some documents.

What went into my head: No, I'm going with Aaron to pick up some donkey bits.


And the AVERAGE I.Q. is 100.